Well, it looks like I may end up having to slow up on my posting soon. I missed posting yesterday because Tuesday I started reading a couple new blogs (Betty Homebanger and Filled and Fooled). Very well written, very entertaining reads. Unfortunately, on Tuesday, I was reading them at work.
Suffice it to say that, like my blog, these two are NSFW. I'm certain that I violated a corporate policy or two, but I'm not sure what they are. Fortunately, no one has called me on it, and, unless someone goes looking at server history, my "secret" is safe with no fallout. Anyway, rather than risk losing my job I decided I'd better save my posting for non-work environments.
It has been an interesting couple of days. Mrs! is heading out of town on Saturday morning, leaving A2 and I here to fend for ourselves. While it may not work out this time, BFF and I are trying to work on a visit for her. It would be nice to see her and spend some time together. She will have some or all of her kids, so I'm not sure how "familiar" we can get, but it will be nice to be together. All that said, we are planning on trying for a night together.
I have to confess, though. I'm nervous as hell over this. My mind keeps running through all sorts of issues that might cause me to get caught. Add to that the simple truth that I've never been with anyone in person other than Mrs! and it causes all sorts of nervous reactions.
I don't think it is so much a fear of performance related anxiety. That may sound cocky, but I don't think I'll have performance issues with BFF. Until the suicide fight, I'd only had issues twice. Since then I've had more, but they are not related to ability as much as all the other issues. So, yeah, maybe I'm cocky about it, and maybe I will be proven wrong, but I don't think so.
No, the anxiety is more related to the fact that this might really happen. That I might actually have a chance to be with BFF, even to spend an entire night with her. The thought of it are exciting, but frightening at the same time. And I'm so worked up, excited and nervous, and it may not even happen if we can't work out the details. Distance sucks.
[Added At Home] - Well, looks like the weekend meet-up will not happen. Disappointed, but I definitely understand. BFF's eldest child has something going on that can't be postponed. I'm definitely not upset about that at all. I've interacted with this child more than any of the others and I love this child almost as much as my own. So, for her happiness, I'll gladly sacrifice my weekend with BFF.
Until next time
~ Anon ~
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